Single digits

We are officially in the single digits. We can actually say that we'll be leaving for Hawaii "next week." It's only fitting since we are getting ready to be in the single digits for the temperature outside as well. Awesome. We are supposed to have a high of 9 degrees later this week. As if we weren't chomping at the bit already....

8 days left

Down to the Wire...

13 weeks into this, you'd think it would get easier. After 91 days, you'd think that it still wouldn't be this difficult. I wish there would come a week where at the weigh-in, I was so sure I'd be down in weight that I wouldn't stress out over it. But that still isn't the case. Then again, it didn't help this week that twice there were lunch meetings where they ordered pizza. So I had two pieces and then watched it the rest of the day. And then there's the gym. Once I get there and get on the machines, I'm good. But just getting there is like pulling teeth. I know how good I feel after busting my ass, but it's like I have amnesia every time I go to put on my workout stuff. But then again, if it wasn't a struggle it wouldn't be worth it. So this morning we were at the 2 week mark, 14 days away from sun, sand, and relaxation. Down another 2.5 lbs! So that's 29lbs total in 13 weeks. I'd LOVE to drop another 6lbs in the final two weeks so I'll be down 35lbs total for the trip, but at this point, I'll take what I can get.

14 days left

IwantafuckingcandybarsobadIcan'tfuckingstandit....

15 days left

Sometimes it's the little things....

Yesterday was a shit day, but last night we went out and found some luggage for the trip and it was on clearance so we bought it...got both pieces for the tagged price of one. Sometimes circling the wagons is needed to make it through the dark times and buying luggage for the trip was another bright spot yesterday. So we'll take it.

17 days left

Sanctuary

The gym was my/our sanctuary this morning. Since we faced 17 different types of crazy before we got there at 9am, it was good to put on the headphones and sweat it out. Block out all the bullshit and drama of it all and just focus on OUTKAST pumping through your iPod and putting one foot in front of the other. I'd like to think that we've broken the equation:

OLD: DRAMA+STRESSx(ANGER+YELLING+CRYING)+CONFUSION-(SANITY+COMMON SENSE)=EATING...A LOT

NEW: DRAMA+STRESSx(ANGER+YELLING+CRYING)+CONFUSION-(SANITY+COMMON SENSE)=SWEATING @ THE GYM

18 days left (thank GOD!)

The Pitfalls and Perils of Girth, Vol. 2

Nothing is more awesome than that air suction, pussy fart sound your lower back makes while trying to get situated in the tanning bed. The only thing that's better is when you get full on air lock and your back fat hermetically seals your ass to the glass of the tanning bed. It's OK though, I'm sure the tanning girls think I'm just in there queefing.

19 days left

When in Rome....

So it's sunny in Hawaii, right. It's not sunny here. Not wanting to burst into flames when we get there, we've decided to get a little base color before heading west. I'm on my second straight day of hitting the tanning beds. Talk about out of place. These poor girls that work at the tanning place must think I'm an Uncle Creeper.

"Um, Ashleigh?"
"Yeah, Madison?"
"What is that big, hairy guy doing here? And was he really, really sweaty?"
"I. KNOW. Madison! He's only been doing 5 minutes at a time, he's creepy...."

Little do Ashleigh and Madison know, I'm going to Hawaii in 3 short weeks and when I come to tan I just come from the gym, hence the abundant perspiration from yours truly. At least the first night was good, since the girl that sold us the package was there and helped us, but tonight, two totally random high school Paris Hil.ton wannabes. Looking at me like I was just going to go back and rub one out in room 9. Just a big sweaty, hairy, ball of awkward folks. But fuck it, in 3 weeks I'll be on the beach. Focus on the goal. Eyes on the prize.

21 days left

Swimming with the sharks

Well, I made the phone call this afternoon.
It's been booked.
The reservations have been made.
The second day we are in Hawaii.
I'll be dragging my happy ass out of bed at 4:30am.
In order to get to the boat by 6:30am.
Then we'll hit the high seas.
Find a nice calm spot.
Put on the snorkel gear.
Chum the water.
Jump in a shark tank.
Then cross something off my bucket list.
I'll be swimming with the sharks.

21 days left

Fatty Boom Batty < 300

3 weeks. 21 days. Hawaii will be here before I know it. It seemed like it would never get here and here it is, just around the corner. Enough flowery bullshit, let's get down to the brass tacks. Today was a weigh-in day. Again this week I was nervous, did I do enough? It sure didn't feel like it. I stepped on the scale, down 1.5 pounds. I'll take it and run. 26.5lbs total in 12 weeks, still ahead of the 2lb per week average. I'm officially under 300. There's no going back. I'm over a 1/4 of the way to my goal. Sure I just came up with it, but what the hell, let's lose an even 100. Sounds like a plan. Keep chugging along. Little by little, going down. I'll take it and run.

Current Weight: 298.5
21 days left

45+30=1347

I was just not feeling it the past couple of days. The weekend was horrible for keeping track of what I was eating and I didn't work out once. Here I was at the precipice of getting below 300 and I was fucking it up. I don't know why I didn't work out. Once I get there and actually start doing it, I enjoy it. It's just the getting there that is a struggle for me. It's like I forget how good I feel afterwards. Well today called for drastic measures since tomorrow is a crucial weigh-in. I did 45 minutes on the treadmill over lunch and even ran a little, burning 947 calories in the process. Then we met at the gym after work and I did another 30 minutes on the elliptical and burned another 400 calories. I went over 4.5 miles total for the day. Hopefully it's enough. We'll see.

22 days left

Relapse

Well, what's rehab without a relapse? Good Lord what have I done? Last night we had a commitment right after work so we weren't able to eat until late (on our way home). We were trying to decide were to go. It was miserable last night and we didn't really want to get out of the car again. So that left just drive-thrus...then I had the brilliant idea of saying, "You know what sounds good? Old Chi.ca.go's nachos.." and that was all it took. We veered off main road and drove down a side street that hadn't been plowed yet almost getting stuck, all for these nachos. I was literally salivating when we sat down I was so excited to eat these nachos. We started off with a side salad and then split the nachos. I'm not gonna lie, it was good. That first bite was awesome. You would think I was a rabid dog tearing into a carcass. I might have even blacked out for a few moments. By the time we walked out of the restaurant I didn't feel too hot. I felt bloated, like there was a boulder in my stomach. I was immediately regretting my choice. Would this fuck up the week for me? Will I get under 300 this week? I'm hitting the gym HARD this afternoon, so we'll see how it all plays out.

26 days left

rehab

28 eight days away. I can do this. It's just like a stay in rehab. You know, like the hilarious Sandra Bullock movie. 28 days. I'm hoping to repel in a wooden area with a high maintenance German fellow and a washed up major league pitcher. 28 days. Maybe I'll be able to do a slap stick parody of a popular midday soap opera. 28 days. I just hope my roommate doesn't OD on the smack smuggled in her sock monkey. 28 days. A girl can dream can't she? This could have been a post about Amy Winehouse.....

Did I mention:

28 days left

I didn't make it, but I'll take it

We are now a mere 4 weeks from Hawaii. 28 days away. That meant a weigh-in this morning. If I was nervous last week, I was thoroughly dreading this week's weigh-in. It was another week of eating out too much, and not tracking my calories like I should. I was so close to getting under 300 for the first time in about 4 years, I just didn't want to fuck it up. Well, I'm down .5lbs. So I'm not under 300 I'm stuck ON it. But I will take it. It's still a loss, it's still moving in the right direction. Coming out of the holidays and still being able to lose something every week is a win in my book. This week I'm going to kill it, just wait and see!

Current Weight: 300
28 days left

With every drop of sweat that leaves my body:

there is a little less self-doubt
there is a little less weakness
there is a little more renewed confidence
there is a little less jiggle
there is a little more strength
there is a little more endurance
there is a little less of the double cheeseburgers I used to eat
there is a little less stress
there is a little more relaxation
there is a little more calm
there is a little less fear
there is a little more desire to reach the goal
there is a little less anger
there is a little less damage
there is a little more serenity
there is a little less cholesterol
there is a little less of me
there is a little more motivation
there is a little less man boob
there is a little more muscle
there is a little more self worth
there is a little less pain
there is a little more drive
there is a little more self reflection
there is a little less wheezing
there is a little less girth
there is a little less creaking in my knees
there is a little more spring in my step
there is a little more pride
there is a little more energy
there is a little less hunger
there is a little less self deprecation
there is a little less frown
there is a little more smile
there is a little more hunger to keep moving
there is a little more belief that I can run 5 miles
there is a little more willingness to just keep fucking going

29 days left

I don't get it...

What on earth would posses someone to douse themselves in perfume BEFORE they work-out? I was at the gym just getting started on my cardio and two ellipticals down, there was a woman just finishing up her work out. Her perfume was so strong it almost knocked me off my machine. I mean it was strong, like linebacker strong. Like Aunt Mable's house strong, but she was young. Like watering eyes and a slight gag reflex strong. My question is why? Are you trying to cover something up? Did you shit your leggins, but still wanted to hit the gym? I'm not saying that it should be all swamp ass and sweaty puss, if you've got an issue, handle your bidness. But you shouldn't take a bath in your sickly sweet perfume and then hit the elliptical. I could actually taste her perfume it was so strong. Fucking people....

29 days left

Under a month....

We are officially 30 days from Hawaii and I'm so fucking excited I can't stand it. It can't come soon enough. I got up to go to work this morning and it was -33 degrees with the wind chill. We are supposed to get another 6-8 inches of snow later this week and then after the snow it's supposed to be -41 with the wind chill. Today the high in Hawaii was 82 degrees. When I got to work this morning I looked and it was 77 degrees in Hawaii but it really felt like 79. Hmmm, that's an interesting concept, it feeling WARMER than the actual temperature. I'm not familiar with that theory, in fact it's usually the EXACT FUCKING OPPOSITE here. It's -7 but feels like -14. Stupid, stupids.

Last night we got online and looked at some possible excursions while in Hawaii. We know we want to go whale watching, we know we'll be at a luau, and then have a full on shark experience where you get in a diving cage while sharks swim around you. As I'm dreaming of the possibilities, it's colder than....well something that's really fucking cold outside our window. 30 short, but I'm sure the longest there will ever be, days away.

30 days left

New Year's Warriors

I went to the gym today over lunch. I usually like to hit it in the afternoon cause there aren't as many people in there, but I had meetings this afternoon, so I could either go at 11am or not at all. Needless to say, it's the first Monday of the new year so the gym is PACKED. While the facility at my work is nice, it couldn't handle the onslaught of those wanting to get started on the resolutions. More power to 'em and I wish them the best, but I can't wait for the obligatory two weeks to pass and the gym starts to thin out a bit. When I work out over lunch, I'm limited on time so I like to get in, get on, and get out. That's kind of hard to do when I'm standing there waiting for an open treadmill. Then there's the old naked guy in the locker room asking how my work out went. I'm not really a chatty Kathy in those situations, so please sir, pick up your old balls off the floor and make your way to the shower.

30 days left

Gettin' up on the Good Foot

New Year's Day morning at the gym. The morning after New Year's Day (i.e. Jan 2nd for the slower readers) at the gym. Starting the new year off on the good foot. Continuing the trek. It feels good to be in a rhythm.

32 days left